-Start by giving your child a direction that tells your child what you want him/her to do. For example if your son is picking on his sister, say “please leave your sister alone” or if your daughter yelling say “please use a soft voice.”
-After you give the direction wait 5 seconds to decide if your child has obeyed. This 5 seconds is just for you to decide if your child is obeying. When children know they have 5 seconds they often wait until the very last second to obey.
-If your child obeys right away praise him/her for cooperating.
-If your child does not obey give a warning first that restates the direction and says that there will be a time out if the direction is not followed. For example “if you don’t use a soft voice you will have to go to time out.”
-Wait another 5 seconds to see if your child obeys.
-If your child does not obey follow through on the time out right away. This shows your child that you are being consistent with what you have said.
-Your child should not receive any attention while in time-out. This means you should not say anything to your child and you should not look at or use facial expressions either.
-Once your child has been in a time out spot for 3 minutes AND is quiet ask if he/she is ready to complete the initial direction.
-If your child is not ready then have your child sit in time out for another round. Do this as many times as it takes until your child is ready to follow that initial direction you gave.
-If your child gets up from the chair give a warning that if he/she gets up again there will be a second consequence (for example loss of a privilege just for that day). If your child gets off the chair again then follow through on taking that privilege away.
-After your child is out of time out praise the next thing you see that you approve of in your child’s behavior.
*These tips were drawn from the Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) Treatment Manual by Sheila Eyberg, Ph.D. Find out more about PCIT at www.pcit.org.